I am intrigued by how Mr David Kraal describes the stages of change in his life (A greyer Christmas this year, but still looking for a rainbow, Dec 23).

There are circumstances that we can choose to change. Walking away from a toxic relationship, quitting a drinking habit and going for regular health screening are examples of positive change.

However, there are circumstances beyond our control, and they can activate a sense of helplessness and frustration.

These are simply a part of life. How we handle them is what makes the difference between misery and peacefulness.

Even when we cannot change the circumstances, we can change our attitude towards and our relationship with those circumstances. Acceptance makes all the difference.

Accepting circumstances does not mean that we have to like what’s happening, it just means working with what we have.

Perhaps the vibrant colours of the rainbow are in us to stay when we live the spirit of Christmas every day.