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I think it would be cool, using the significant combined musical knowledge of the people on this forum to create the Acclaimedmusic worst albums of all time list.
This would not be a list for that album in the top 200 that you hate because it's higher than your favorite album of all time; this is a list for truly heinous offenses against the ears. The crappiest of the crappy.
This is my nomination to start things off; I'm sure many of you are familiar with this double disc abomination, and wish you weren't. This has all the makings of a bad album. A bunch of huge stars butchering the songs of the most acclaimed band of all-time in such a way that it's become legendary.
I think it would be awesome if we could compile a list of 100 albums that inhabbit this same murky cross-section of self-importance, commercial and critical failure, and just plain sucking.
Squeeze by The Velvet Underground and Mardi Gras by Creedence Clearwater Revival. What were they thinking?
The single worst album I've ever heard was "All the Right Reasons" by Nickelback. The only reason I ever listened to it was so I could write a review of it for the sole purpose of tearing it into pieces. To say it was bad would be an understatement. I'm sure you're all familiar enough with the band to know how truly bad they are. But let me recap.
1. The singer can't sing. He just fucking can't. He sounds like he has a hernia. Or he's constipated. Or both.
2. Every song sounds the same. And I'm not talking like how all the Ramones songs kinda sound similar, because for the Ramones, that actually works in their favor. No, for Nickelback, all the songs sound the same, and all the songs are shit.
3. There is not a single ounce of experimentation in here. Nickelback are the worst band ever, and this album sounds not only exactly like everything they did before it, but it also sounds like every single shitty post-grunge song from about 1994 to 2005 (the release date of this album).
4. The lyrics. Just read them. I don't really ask for Shakespeare when it comes to rock lyrics, but God, they're so freaking terrible they have to be heard to be believed.
5. Technical proficiency isn't really all that important to me, (I like the Sex Pistols after all) but nobody in this band has anything even close to resembling technical proficiency.
We did a worst songs poll a year or two ago.
It's easier to come up with 'Worst songs' than 'Worst albums', because most of the time if you hear a song that's truly awful you don't listen to the rest of the album.
The worst thing about Nickelback is not how awful they sound, but that all the bands that copied them sound even worse. You wouldn't believe the songs I'm forced to listen to in CVSes and grocery stores. They can't even come close to singing in key and all their lyrics are exhibitionist self pity.
Seriously, when somebody like Katy Perry comes on at work, I'm happy. I think 'FINALLY a song where the notes sung actually correspond to a scale!'
I like a Katy Perry song: Teenage Dream, she's killing a cat during Firework with some lame lyrics. Kesha is a try too-hard. That "group" 3OH3! is also unbelievable awful, Lady Gaga thinks she's the second coming of Jesus with some sub-Bjork songs and outifts,.. I'm bombarded with pop music everyday because of my friends (most recently Britney's Femme Fatale and Rebecca Black's Friday) so i have a a good knowledge of some pretty bad things. I love my ipod and earphones so much!
In response to HRS: For the record, I like two Katy Perry songs- "Teenage Dream" and "Hot N Cold". But the rest of her stuff is bad. Not Nicklelback bad, but still pretty bad.
Lady Gaga is tolerable at best ("Poker Face", "Paparazzi")
and at worst completely annoying ("Bad Romance", probably every other song she's ever done). The main thing that annoys me about her is her attitude, how she thinks she's a capital A artist, (or as HRS said Jesus). She isn't an artist. She's style over substance.
3OH3! is irredeemably bad.
In response to BillAdama: I will agree that bands like Hinder, Theory of a Dead Man, and Daughtry who all were influenced by Nickelback may come close to Nickelback in terms of horrible. Though Nickelback still holds that dubious honor of being my least favorite band ever.
Also, "IT'S FRIDAY FRIDAY YOU GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY!!!"
At least everybody whose listened to that song knows how bad it is.
I think that 'Friday' song has irony value to it. It's like a Mad TV parody.
I also think that the amount you're forced to listen to it is a major component in the awfulness of a song. There are far worse songs than the one playing on the radio, but they never cause anybody pain.
How about that "Purple People Eater" song?
First, it's a kid song but hearing it as a kid freaked me out, with the idea of this thing eating people. Then, there's that constant screech of all the monster's dialog. Add that to a melody and vocal style that maxes out the kitsch meter, you get pure gut-wrenching awfulness.
And how about AC/DC: "I used to love her...but I had to kill her!"
To Nick: Nickelback is awfully bad and the same, i remember when people used to say to me that they, Simple Plan, Panic! At the Disco, Jonas Brothers and The Fray were the top male fronted band of the last 10 years. That's why I used to hate male singers, now i know how wrong they were and how dumb i was. Jonas loved the unbiased Beatles comparisons (poor things!), Miley Cyrus and her annoying Party in the USA, Jessie J and her price tag (15 minutes later she is selling something to us in a tv ad), Christina Aguilera oversinging in everything she touches, Britney Spears is catchy and has the best producers (even Robyn making backing vocals) but she's too robotic vocally. I used to tolerate P!nk, she has her catchy material but she is another pop singer that thinks she is a rock goddess - don't even make me start talking about the Simpson sisters. Jennifer Lopez exploiting the American Idol machine to get some relevance and Mariah Carey, basically the only person in the world that thinks that Billboard #1s are what makes her the greatest ever. Kelly Clarkson has the vocals chops, her lyrics are kinda cliche and her fans make her out to be the greatest artist of all time, but she has some fine tracks and is down to earth, she's the most tolerable of all. I guess the only straight pop artists these days that i really like and have delivered solid albums are Robyn, Roisin Murphy, Lily Allen and Annie.
And the lyric you posted: that's songwriting gold! Really: "PARTYIN' AND PARTYIN' AND YEAH FUN FUN FUN" how long did she take to come out with the best song of the last 10 years? And people is stil buying this at iTunes? Kim Kardashian is also a singer? Mainstream music had better days!
And in a turn of events, i'm slightly more annoyed with artists that are such a load of crap in terms of quality and just think they're the best since Kurt Cobain left us: Kings of Leon, Black Eyed Peas, Kesha (she said she loved to write something for Britney, since she's a songwriting before an artist), Lady Gaga, Jessie J, Usher, Rihanna, Pitbull, mainstream r&b/hip hop in general and the Glee cast.
To Jonathon: This might be a nice topic if people start to open up about which albums they really hate or dislike. Especially the ones by critically acclaimed bands.
To BillAdama: I used to think that every AC/DC song was about hell and had the same melody back in the day. I never knew which one was playing on the Radio.
Another track that I used to hate a lot was that stupid "Party Like a Rockstar", there was also that Jojo track: "Too Little Too Late" that got so annoying after being overplayed - at least she was on key, unlike Ashlee Simpson. And who can forget Hilary Duff trying to fit a square into a circle in "Come Clean"? I hate my mainstream pop days so much and Avril Lavigne's I'm With You
On the other side, I still like "...Baby One More Time" - it's fun, it's schoolgirl interesting (can't say the same about the russian chicks making out each other and that annoying "All the Things She Said"), maybe it's ironic that i like the song that started a lot of the crap we listen those days?
I cannot in good faith list album titles, since it would be impossible to make it through and entire album from any of these artists, but these are the artists I think of when talking about the worst of all-time:
Keith McChesney (My generalization of all mainstream new country guys)
(I know I'll get shit for this) Frank Zappa
Any rapper with 'Lil or Young in their name
Wack Eyed Peas
Insane Clown Posse
Billy ray Cyrus
Anyone from American Idol
Anyone with the last name of Simpson
A bunch of late 80's Hair bands (Stryper, Loudness, Rhino Bucket... this list could go on...)
Cheesy 70's soft rock artists...
This is just the tip of the iceburg!!!
i only own(ed) two gawdooful albums (MC Hammer's Too Legit To Quit and Beach Boys' Summer In Paradise) and one hilarious WTF (Having Fun On Stage With Elvis) so far... i think i'll pass this one
(or should i just cheat by referencing these guys? huhhh...)
no objections on my part, Henry (Henry, alright! Professor X and Magneto addressed each other with their civil names, too..)
they also listed my #2 alltime_gem on #23. but the reading was fun at least. yet it's a good point to start in some way. nickelblack eyed peas records suck. yeah, big news. too tired to yawn now. let's start with the big guns instead..
ps: whoahwhoa... i remember another one: Neil Young's re-ac-tor... speaking of Candy Flips and guilty pleasures again
pps: the Shaggs rule mankind
Oops, Henry, sorry to disagree with you (again) but I find Utopia's "Deface the Music" rather amusing. It's a parody/pastiche/hommage to The Beatles, all the songs are Rundgren originals but trying to recreate the characteristic sound of the Fab Four. I can understand that it could be seen as sacrilege to a serious Beatlemaniac, showing clearly all the tricks on songwriting and arrangements of Lennon/McCartney (especially Paul's, Todd nailed the typical Macca style in songs like "Alone" or "All Smiles").
The main drawback in my opinion is that, instead recreating an overall Beatles sound, they often recreated the sound of a particular song, and this is not that funny. "Crystal Ball" is based on "Can't Buy Me Love", "That's Not Right" on "Eight Days a Week", "Take It Home" on "Day Tripper", "Feel Too Good" mixes "Getting Better", "With a Little Help From My Friends" and "Fixing a Hole", "Everybody Else Is Wrong" mixes "Strawberry Fields Forever" and "I Am the Walrus". And so on. You can even find there a funny recreation of the typical Ringo song on "Always Late". Another funny thing is that while they trying to recreate the sound of "Penny Lane" on "Hoi Poloi" they found instead the sound that was going to define the mid80s XTC albums (Rundgren was going to be the producer of the fantastic "Skylarking").
So it's not obviously a good album, it's nothing more than a joke. But in my opinion a rather brilliant joke. And some songs stand for themselves if you abstract it from the pastiche concept, like "I Just Want to Touch You". But judge for yourself, the complete album is available on You Tube.
01. I Just Want to Touch You
02. Crystal Ball
03. Where Does the World Go to Hide
04. Silly Boy
06. That's Not Right
07. Take It Home
08. Hoi Poloi
09. Life Goes On
10. Feel Too Good
11. Always Late
12. All Smiles
13. Everybody Else Is Wrong
I'd have to go with that Limp Bizkit album as the #1 worst of all time. Nookie, Rollin, that 'Scream the chorus' cover of Faith. My god.
The thing about the Nickelback imitators is that they all do the same annoying things.
1) They pronounce their O's as hard A's ("If I were yaaaaooou!")
2) Whenever they try to sing a high note their voice breaks to falsetto.
3) Otherwise, their voice is loud and scratchy and nowhere near an actual Pythagorean note.
I don't have the heart to go back earlier than last decade, but here are the five worst albums I had the misfortune of listening to during that time period.
1) “Results May Vary” by Limp Bizkit (2003): After the departure of guitarist Wes Borland, it became apparent that all Fred Durst could spew forth was a primordial din of tuneless noise. The results didn't vary, they all sucked.
2) Kevin Federline, “Playing With Fire” (2006): Do I really need to say anything about this one? If you made your own rap cassettes back in high school and still think they're pretty good today, then this album is for you.
3) Moby, “Hotel” (2005): This Hotel was one that only insomniacs would want to check into because of its possible use as a sleep aid. Culminates the biggest three-album decline of any major star: from the brilliant “Play” to the good “13 Stars” to this: sleeping pills in audio form.
4) “Inspiration” by William Hung (2004): Who can forget his classic rendition of “She Bang” on “American Idol?” I’ve tried, and I can’t. But the lowlight here is a truly awful, vocally inept version of R. Kelly’s “I Believe I Can Fly.” Speaking of R. Kelly ...
5) “TP.3 Reloaded” by R. Kelly (2005): The first 14 songs are merely bland R&B, but it’s on the insipidly inspired mini-opera “Trapped in the Closet” that Kelly shines. The vapid story line is hilariously awful. Tip: If you are ever trapped in a closet, remember to put your cell phone on vibrate.
Used To Love Her is Guns 'n Roses.
It's hard to find awful albums because not only do you not listen to an album if you heard a bad song, most of the time I turn a really bad album off after a couple songs and can only guess how the rest goes.
But, according to what I've entered on RYM, I've listened to 14 awful albums in full. For the most part they are by bands I normally like or highly acclaimed albums which is the reason I gave them a full listen. Now, I wouldn't say these are the worst of the worst. Just the worst of the albums I've listened to in my life and obviously only based on my musical tastes. I know some of these albums are favorites of others.
Dandy Warhols- Odditorium or the Warlords of Mars
Minus 5- Killingsworth
Genesis- Selling England By the Pound
54-40 - 54-40 (The Green Album)
Blind Melon - Blind Melon
Buckcherry - Time Bomb
Dire Straits - Brothers in Arms
Juliana Hatfield - How to Walk Away
New Radicals - Maybe You've Been Brainwashed Too
Sting - The Dream of the Blue Turtles
U2 - Boy
Scott Walker - Scott 4
Scott Walker - Tilt
OK, I'm going to run for cover now.
Yeah, those are some of my favorites. You are WAY OFF!
Good call on New Radicals though.
Something/Anything? is such a masterpiece (L)
sames goes to A Wizard, A True Star. I stopped to listen to Todd after his self-titled, safe Hermit Of Mink Hollow.
Kind of surprised to not see people mention Liz Phair's self-titled - i don't hate it nor think it is a worst of all time contender, but some do, so maybe even that album had a fair share of goods? Well, listening to Guyville again, like i do every week since 2007, I must say that its power hasn't receded one yotta! I really love that record.
And the last Tori Amos was totally a slap in the face in terms of awfulness.
I agree with most of those ones you mentioned except that Boy is my second favorite U2 album.
'You Get What You Give' might have some of the most obnoxious lyrics ever written. A song that's heavily promoted on a big label calling everyone else promoted on big labels fakes. That's like irony squared. And he picked the artists to call out based on easier targets than the casting of a celebrity reality show.
It's my #22 song of all-time, and the album is my #25, so I obviously completely disagree with regards to the New Radicals. I particularly love the lyrics, and I don't really see the irony. Just because they signed with a big label they can't criticize other artists? That makes no sense; it's like saying you can't say something bad about the media on television.
This is a clip from a Swedish comedy show in the public broadcasting channel. At 0:46 a guy says
"Pengarna som har gått åt till att producera det här programmet hade istället kunnat användas till att finansiera bromsmedicin för 1200 hiv-smittade barn. Är det värt det?"
And then an image saying "SVT humor - godkänd av staten"
Translated into English:
"The money that has been spent to produce this program could instead have been used to finance drugs for 1,200 HIV-infected children. Is it worth it?"
And then an image saying "Swedish Television Comedy - approved by the government"
Hilary Duff is so tone deaf! Just comment that cause it was passing on tv a movie of hers where she wins a competition of best singer in a music school... raise your voice is the name of it, i guess! REALLY??? WTF kind of school is that? She's basically speaking on that Come Clean track, just awful. Mainstream music had a lot of phases since 2000, amazing how it's always crappy.
Bowling for Soup - A Hangover You Don't Deserve
I've got a trilogy of worst albums. I actually think he's up to 5 now by the same artist. Your mom or your great aunts probably own all five of these albums. The Great American Song Book 1-5 by Rod Stewart. Just when you thought he couldn't get anymore uncool than he already was. He knows the only people who actually by his albums nowadays are in their mid 60s so now he's just covering songs they all grew up to. What's even more creepy are usually his only young fans are the ones he actually dates and they keep getting younger and younger. I don't think he's even that rich.
That casts the lyrics in a new light, but I think he overlooked the fact that it's hard to decipher the former lyrics. They're grammatically awkward, use uncommon words with muffled consonants and lack pauses between words. Until you wrote those out, I had no idea what he was saying, even after hearing them dozens of times when it came out.
And those still come off as a little reactionary goth-kidsy. They sound like privileged kids who watched a Michael Moore film and now consider themselves experts.
well maybe. Next to Steven Tyler he's probably the biggest media whore sellout in rock N roll history. So that would be why the cash keeps flowing in. Both are equally as creepy. I could imagine what all the indie rock snobs think of these two. They would probably consider them the antiChrist.
For that matter, what's wrong with big bankers buying? If they're buying it means the economy is healthy, and it's easier to get a mortgage loan!
Nickelback? Black Eyed Peas? Limp Bizkit? Katy Perry? Many of the artists mentioned in this thread appear in my EOY lists.
Am I being uncool? Guess so.
Do I Care?
Not. One. Fuckin'. Bit.
Only lame hipster types do.
but you DO know about the web trap?, like..
[don't. post. IDOUGHNTCAREZ. on. th3. int4netz. EVER]
it only makes you look like you care the shit out of it..
..ps: yeah, go eighties yourself, Moonbeam, Katy is the Kylie of my generation
Slick - How can you put Poinson (and Zappa) on the same list as some of those other artists?
I'd say My World 2.0 is the worst album ever. Ever. EVER!!
see? no one with a postcybfried mind's going believe you at this point.. we're doomed, son, we're doomed..
Haha, so be it.
I should defend Creed. People are lumping them in with the real dredges.
My Own Prison is quite a decent album. 6/10. Nothing spectacular, but not trash either. Far, far above the likes of Nickelback and Limp Bizkit.
Can I add the Residents? I'm probably the only one, but I see no redeeming value to their "music"...
No one seems to have mentioned William Shatner's The Transformed Man yet...
because it succeeded in touching Sgt. Peppered spectres in the end... it's the Starship Troopers of all albums
do you really want to live in a world without a "Mister Tambouriiine Maaaan"!?
There is SO much awful music out there. Anyone who's ever been a music director at a freeform station can tell you so. I reviewed and tossed aside so many terrible albums by bands looking for airplay when I was a music director. But if anything is a testament to how taste is subjective, some albums I tossed to the unplayable bin had to be dug out because DJ's were asking for them!
I think a major component in the awfulness of a song is how much you're forced to hear it.
There's far worse stuff out there than Simple Plan or Nickelback, but none of it has ever had an adverse effect on my eardrums. It's never played in a situation where I don't have the ability to turn it off or leave the room.
And I do find Nick Lachey, Del Amitri and Simple Plan far worse than the crap they play on country stations.
KUMM in Morris, Minnesota.
Well, maybe their other stuff is better, but the song by them I've been unwillingly hearing over and over for the past couple years is "Not Where It's At". My problem with that song has more to do with the lyrics than the music. It pretty much sums up all that is hypocritical about pop music.
This guy is accusing this girl of being shallow and superficial because she doesn't want him. But, he keeps emphasizing 'The one girl that I want'. It seems like he's turned down other girls because they are not 'where it's at'. So, it's okay for him to be shallow and superficial, but it's not okay for women. I don't get the impression these lyrics are supposed to be ironic: We are supposed to feel the singer deserves to be with this girl.
But, yes, this song is more instrumentally and melodically competent than the other groups I mentioned. I was just googling the song lyrics I'm forced to listen to every day at work.
My RYM friends are mostly AM'ers so I pulled up a chart for the worst albums of all time based only on friends ratings. Here's what I disagree with and agree with.
Black Flag- Damaged: Rise Above alone should keep it off any worst album list.
Bon Jovi- Slippery When Wet: I'm not a fan but it's not a bad album.
Red Hot Chili Peppers- One Hot Minute: The only RHCP album I like.
Metallica- Load: See Slippery When Wet. Totally agree with Reload though.
RATM- Evil Empire: Is Rage being lumped in with the Limp Bizkit's of the world now? Really strange to see this on the list.
Yeasayer- Odd Blood: Drops off big time after the first 5-6 tracks, but those tracks are pretty great.
All of the nu-metal bands who profit off of a message of anger. These are the worst albums/bands because at least with crappy pop music you can say kids are just having fun, but this music is actually harmful.
Stooges- The Weirdness: Probably one of the worst albums I've ever heard.
Yes, nj, The Shaggs
The worst band of all time according to French critic Antoine de Caunes
Philosophy of the World
Can you think of a drummer girl who's worse than Meg White ? (without the big tits)
Youtube them, every song is a masterpiece of badness
zappa used to say that the Shags were more interesting than the Beatles
Seems like it's the cool thing to hate on Nickelback. I don't care for them, but they're pretty harmless, aren't they? To me they're just nothing more than bland radio rock...there's a ton of other bands just as average, so I've always wondered why they get picked on. I can think of lots more bands that grate my nerves much more than them.
I'm pretty sure we can all do better than Nickelback.
Now, wanna talk about annoying? The band that does that "Hey There Delilah" song (is that the Plain White Ts?), or James Blount, or Circa Survive (saw these guys open for Thrice...their entire set made me cringe in embarrassment).
Well, I don't like U2 in general, but Boy is probably my least favorite. It sounds nothing like post-punk to me. Maybe some post-punk influences but it's not nearly as technical as some of the great post-punk albums and it's definitely lacking lyrically. It's not raw because it's meant to be raw, it's raw because it's a band that hasn't polished their sound yet. War is a far better album.