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Dungeon Keeper 2

Uh oh, another retrospective by A Grue, and it's not in video format! Cue the angry mob! Quick, everyone grab your pitchforks and torches! To arms! To battle!


[Darkness hangs over the night like a deathly pall, creeping into the hearts and souls of a bloodthirsty crowd, who scream for vengeance. White picket signs can be seen in the torchlight among the assemblage, which convey various messages in blood red paint. "This Grue needs to be defanged!" "OBEY OR DESIST" "Has anyone seen my pitchfork?" Shocking stuff. A reporter approaches the scene with caution, her cameraman following behind at an even more judicious pace.]

REPORTER: [holding her fingertips over one ear and shouting to be heard over the mob] I am now here live at the scene where a young man known as "A Grue" has barricaded himself inside of his suburban home after releasing yet ANOTHER article for his column in a written format instead of video! His rabid "fans" claim that his videos were already "mediocre," but after the release of his Duke Nukem 2 retrospective just a mere few months ago, The World of Myth's forums exploded with negative feedback! With yet more bare minimum effort on the part of A Grue, the angry viewers have now formed a coalition to either bring unspecified improvement to his work, or an untimely conclusion to his life!

MOB: [chanting] You need to make it superior, or else we'll kick your posterior! You need to make it superior, or else we'll kick your posterior!

REPORTER: Now interestingly enough, a couple of protest PROTESTERS have shown up to this protest! [walks toward two individuals, who stand a good distance away from the raging tempest. They hold two picket signs, which read in printed black font, "Isn't this kind of silly?" and "The Grue's Gruel: Now with 500% more trolls!"] Hello there! I'm reporter Stacy Jennings with Channel 5 News! And you would be?

MAN: My name is Richard.

REPORTER: And you, ma'am?

WOMAN: I'm Jennie.

REPORTER: I see. And can either of you two tell me why you're here tonight?

RICHARD: Well, when I originally saw this mob forming, I decided to check out what all the fuss was about, and was very surprised at the cause of this brouhaha. I was expecting to find something awful, but instead I found some videos and articles created by a regular guy who set aside his own free time to create something for our entertainment for no pay. Just because he enjoys plying his craft. Not only was it made on a zero budget with a video camera he happened to have lying around the house, but it was fairly funny as well. I just decided to show up to display my support for his efforts.

REPORTER: [nods and turns her head] And do you have anything to add to this, ma'am?

JENNIE: Oh, no, not much, really. Richard summed it up pretty well, I think. I'm just here because I like video games too, and I think A Grue's funny. He definitely doesn't deserve to be hung. ... Hey, speaking of which, isn't this considered conspiracy to murder or something? I'm pretty sure it's against the law; I mean, this isn't 1800s England. Shouldn't the police--

REPORTER: Insightful, just insightful. I'm speechless. Well, thank you for your time, you two.

JENNIE: But I wasn't---

REPORTER: [begins walking away and heading toward the front of the crowd, cameraman in tow] With those who hold great disdain for The Grue's Gruel greatly outnumbering those who find it a little soupy but still edible, does any hope remain for this young man's videos--or his life? We now take you live to the man leading this entourage of terror! Mr. TG Browning, would you like to make a statement? [holds the microphone towards his mouth]