Does anyone remember a book on English grammar, written by C. W. Turl, MA. And the way the author's name was sometimes changed to COW TURD MAN?
My brother Stuary and I have often laughed about this, so imagine the mirth when I recently found a bookshop through amazon which had one in stock. I duly bought it and Stu received it yesterday.
I don't know if he's taken the biro to it yet!
The Crosville buses had stickers on the windows about damage to seats etc that started off 'the Executive will press for penalties...'... the stickers could be partly scraped away so the r and e from 'press' became an i..... most of them seemed to have this 'upgrade'/ eventually! Happy days...
At this time of year just before Xmas Woolies along Eccleston St stocked a lot of decorative spray paint in the colours gold and silver. A lot of PGS lads managed to nick a can or two and then ran riot around the town spraying graffiti. It was usually stuff like PVBB, WLVBB, and their Huyton and Whiston equivalents (10 points if you can remember what those coded messages meant!). Or the footy stuff LFC and EFC. Annoying for the Liverpool fans that their letter L could be so easily changed to an E. Nicknames were also a favourite of course and when my Mum found out mine and saw the writing on the wall I got a clout round the ear! Happy Days!
In 1975 I was DOWN BY THE SEASIDE with a BLACK COUNTRY WOMAN who would insist on singing THE WANTON SONG at least once a day. I was a bit of a dancer at the time so much preferred a BOOGIE WITH STU but at the local disco "BRON YR AUR" I'd often get TRAMPLED UNDERFOOT by the locals. After a hard night on the town we'd emerge INTO THE LIGHT wearing our KASHMIR sweaters and reminisce about our NIGHT FLIGHT as we headed off home. Too drunk to drive THE ROVER we'd walk instead to the HOUSES OF THE HOLY where we'd booked a room for a week. We'd stayed there before TEN YEARS GONE and had eaten so much CUSTARD PIE that it had made us feel SICK AGAIN. So sick, I thought I was IN MY TIME OF DYING but she reminded me that it was all just PHYSICAL GRAFFITI, we'd live to see another day and it wasn't our SWANSONG.
After last night's performance has put the whole country into a state of manic anticipation and euphoria I am going to go out today and spray on the front of my house (freshly painted last week by the way) "Woy can't England win it?".